The next time you meet someone who has made a total transformation with their health and fitness, don’t ask them what diet they followed or what exercise program they did. This doesn’t matter as much as you think it does. In fact, it ALL works as long as you stay in a calorie deficit; carnivore, Paleo, plant-based, keto, fasting, etc. And every type of exercise is better than sitting on the couch all day.
Instead, ask them about …
Their daily routine, including their sleep cycle.
What you do outside of the gym, is where the majority of change happens. The gym makes up maybe 60 minutes of your day, 3-5x a week.
In the short term, you can lose body fat and build muscle in a sleep deficit, but it will be unsustainable and you will feel like shit almost all the time. When you don’t feel great, you often don’t perform well in any area of life. Your mood takes a hit, and everything feels like an uphill battle. It doesn’t need to be this way if you take the time to develop helpful morning and evening routines.
It’s in your best interest to make good quality sleep a priority. Aim for 7-9 hours a night. This will not only make fat loss and building muscle easier, it’s also important to get enough good quality sleep every night to keep your immune system strong, and manage your blood sugar and your blood pressure.
What their mindset is around change and discomfort.
Like it or not, you’re going to need to change your habits if you’re going to change your body. This will not be easy and it certainly won’t be comfortable. People who make the most impressive body composition changes embrace the challenges of restructuring their schedules, setting boundaries, getting to the gym and the grocery store every week, prioritizing self-care, and maintaining consistency in everything.
Most of us don’t really think about what we’re doing, we just move through life. We don’t take time to thoughtfully plan and reflect to understand if what we’re doing is even working. This is a mistake that will cost you months and possibly years of wasted effort. Become more insightful in how you design your life, and realize that you will have to do hard things to get where you want to go.
What lessons they learned in the process.
In order to change our body, we need to learn new things. What are macronutrients? What muscle group am I training in the gym, and why I am performing THIS particular exercise? What impact does alcohol have on sleep quality? How much protein should I consume? How is chronic stress sabotaging results? Get curious about what it takes to make a real change. People who go through any kind of transformation have learned valuable lessons along the way. Ask good questions, and then listen with intent.
How they manage their stress.
What helps you relax and unwind is going to be different than what helps someone else, but it’s still important to hear about the strategies and coping mechanisms other people use to effectively manage their stress.
What helps me: Daily journaling, 10 min. Of mindfulness meditation/visualization, lifting weights, walking outside in nature, specifically hiking in the mountains where I can get a break from traffic noise and other people’s bullshit. Relaxing on the couch. Reading a book. Spending time with my wife, just laughing and enjoying one another’s company.
What their support system looks like.
You absolutely can be successful without a support system, just like you can lose body fat and build muscle in a sleep deficit. It’s just going to be unnecessarily difficult. Whether you invest in a fitness coach, ask your spouse to help with the kids so you can go to the gym, or get a workout buddy for added accountability and fun, it’s in your best interest to surround yourself with people who are willing to help you and lift you up.
How they handle setbacks and tough days.
Tough days are a normal part of life. We all have them. Learning from someone who has made it through the other side of difficulty is invaluable. It gives us insight into our own lives and methods of working through inevitable life stressors.
Figuring out how someone else went about handling the days where they felt tired, unmotivated, and the brink of quitting (yet, choosing to persevere) can be really helpful.
How many steps they take per day, on average.
Daily steps make up a significant portion of calorie expenditure. Moving more often throughout the day is going to make fat loss easier, and bodyweight maintenance more sustainable. Having an active lifestyle outside of the gym is important for overall health and wellbeing. Track your daily steps on your phone or smart watch.
How their healthy habits have impacted their family life, their relationships and their career.
When someone decides to switch up their routine to make healthy eating more of a priority, and to make more time for the gym, the people in their life take notice. Your spouse, your kids, your friends and your co-workers will often be so inspired by your healthy lifestyle, they will want to join you. This has a reciprocal benefit, where it inspires you to keep going when you see others are positively affected by your behavior. It’s a win-win. When you know other people are emulating your habits, you realize how influential you can be to the people closest to you. This is powerful.
When you feel better, you perform better in all areas of life. Most people don’t realize that when they prioritize their health, they will improve their productivity at work. This has a positive impact on finances and self-esteem. Additionally, relationships often get a boost.
Don’t get it twisted, nutrition and exercise are important, but when you are ready to change your body, you will first need to change your thoughts, your beliefs, and your behavior.